Peter Jackson's "Dambusters"

[Kyt]

Sadly I doubt that we'll see an image like this for the new film.

And W/C McCarthy's obit:
http://www3.sympatico.ca/jimlynch/bharis32.htm

[Kitty]

I think Vic said they also have some WW2 617 crew members and a couple of the last survivors on board, but not sure.

[Geedee]

Found this on another forum some time ago. Don't know the author (wasnt mentioned ) but had me in stitches.

Personally, I hope they dont continue as most remakes these days are soo OTT with CGI stuff that, clever though it is, it detracts from the story as the planes are just too clean etc.

Anyway...the funny bit :

A major new Hollywood film...

DAM BUSTERS II or WHO YOU GONNA BOMB?

Hollywood's authentic story of the Six-Seventeenth Eagle Bomb Squadron Of the Royal British Air Corps.

THE INTRO....
It is 1941. Hitler has invaded Europe and England alone fights back Aided by a handful of international volunteers, including GI Gibson (Tom Cruise)an American pilot who had already had a key role in winning the Battle Of Britain.
Intelligence has identified that the destruction of a giant dam in central Germany is the key to Allied victory.

THE FIRST RAID....
A raid on the dam by the British Lan-Casters of the 6-17th is ordered, to be led by its war-weary cockney CO (Michael Caine). The crews are filmed boarding the Confederate Air Force's Liberator.
A background of sun-drenched Texan prairie substitutes for Scamppington

Air Force Base and the East Anglian Fens in January.
Colour-enhanced black and white library shots are then used for the Raid - DC-6 engine start, taxiing Halifaxes, Spitfire mass take-off, formation of B24s, Lan-caster at night, bombs dropping from a Mitchell, a B-17 and Focke-Wulf Condor being shot down, the FAA's Boeing 707 crashing in flames.
As with all US aviation films since the invention of "talkies", the aircraft soundtrack consists only of the roar of Pratt & Whitney radial engines, specially recorded during a Harvard mass flypast at the annual Oshkosh air show.
But the raid is a failure, and only GI and his crew survive to try again. Danny De Vito plays the part of the bomb aimer.

THE WEAPON....

After the disastrous first dam raid, it is obvious a new type of weapon Is needed. By chance Barn S. Wallace (Morgan Freeman), the leading US scientist And aviation expert, is in London explaining his invention of the jet engine to an unknown British engineer, Frank V. Tel.
Thinking back to his childhood, Barn remembers skimming rocks across a Lake in native New Hampshire, and quickly comes up with a design for a Bouncing bomb - but it is too large for any British aircraft to carry.

THE AIRCRAFT....

Fortunately, Wallace has brought with him to England the only example of his latest bomber design, the B-29. Cut to the CAF's B-29, painted gloss caramel and vivid green with French roundels, being pulled from its Hangar at Midland, TX, so that GI and his crew can test fly the new bouncing munition over the neighbouring Scotland, and prepare for the raid.

THE RAID....

Shots of Cruise and gang boarding the B-29, plus take-off shots over The American Midwest. Then computer-generated images for outbound flight, the final - and successful - bombing run using the last remaining weapon on board, and the dogfights on the return leg.

Throughout, the standard CGI conventions are used. All WW2 single-seat fighters fly at a minimum Mach 0.9 in +7g manoeuvres, while any multi-engine aeroplane drones along straight and level at 130 kt.

THE COMMAND CENTER....

In a map-encrusted bunker, Barn waits tensely for the results of the raid.
Although the news is of success, he starts to become saddened by the loss of aircrew involved. But, just at that moment, a well-spoken Home Counties WAAF officer (Catherine Zeta Jones) in a starched Virginia McKenna military blouse appears, bearing a tray of Starbucks mugs.
She utters that immortal line - "Cocoa Latte, Sir?" - and all is well.
Information comes in that the flooding from the broken dam has flooded Hitler's bunker (clip fromChaplin as the Great Dictator), thwarting the launch of a new V3 rocket aimed at the Summit Conference being held in buckingham Palace, London, England.
The water also slows the Russian advance, allowing Patton (Harrison
Ford) to capture Berlin and Eastern Germany for the Allies.

THE LANDFALL....

Meanwhile, with three engines blazing and feathered, Gibson and the surviving crew nurse the crippled B-29 back across the Channel.
They just manage to climb over the White Cliffs of Dover to see in the Near distance the welcoming runway lights of their Lincolnshire airfield.
Having studied brain surgery before joining up, the B-29's chirpy Australian assistant cook (Kylie Minogue) saves the lives of injured crew members as the bomber belly-lands onto its home base. It slides to a halt a few Feet from the control tower, where Winston Churchill (Dan Ackroyd) watches proudly.
Also in the scene, in a technology enhancement, is Ronnie Reagan on his horse Trigger.

THE FINALE....

GI stands framed by the blazing wreckage of a redundant Fokker Friendship airliner bought especially for this scene.
Since a wholesome happy ending is mandatory in today's commercial cinema, in a final shot he is joined by "Native-African-American", his loyal dog. Despite the pair of Artificial legs and prosthetic tail fitted after being injured in three major road accidents on the Great North Road during his master's absence, the Labrador bounds joyfully into the sunset with some dame called Vera Lynn singing about the White Cliffs.

[Antipodean Andy]

Since a wholesome happy ending is mandatory in today's commercial cinema, in a final shot he is joined by "Native-African-American", his loyal dog. Despite the pair of Artificial legs and prosthetic tail fitted after being injured in three major road accidents on the Great North Road during his master's absence, the Labrador bounds joyfully into the sunset with some dame called Vera Lynn singing about the White Cliffs.

Loved the whole lot but the above had me in stitches! "Native-African-American, it's Native-African-American", they cry as the dam is breached.

All I can say is that since Peter Jackson is a Kiwi (and 40+ so you'd think has some RAF understanding in his veins), you'd have to think it'd be a bit more classier/authentic than if Jerry Bruckheimer got hold of it!

[Antipodean Andy]

Originally Posted by Kyt

Sadly I doubt that we'll see an image like this for the new film.

And W/C McCarthy's obit:
http://www3.sympatico.ca/jimlynch/bharis32.htm

Oooh, methinks I need to find a copy of that poster!

[Kyt]

That had me in stitches (though a part of me scared s***less that some Hollywood type is now going to actually use this as the script)

Originally Posted by Geedee

Danny De Vito plays the part of the bomb aimer.

Disappointed about his role. I was hoping he'd play a similar part to Major T. J. "King" Kong in Dr Stranglove (played by Slim Pickens)

[spidge]

Kitty, where is Kitty?

GD is being sacrilegious with your relatives film.

Great one GD......in stiches!

[Geedee]

[quote=Kyt;10456]That had me in stitches (though a part of me scared s***less that some Hollywood type is now going to actually use this as the script)



Disappointed about his role. I was hoping he'd play a similar part to Major T. J. "King" Kong in Dr Stranglove (played by Slim Pickens)

All they need to add to make it complete, is the German sentry in the spoof C*rlsb*rg advert that shows his goal keeping skills to keep the bombs from hitting the damn dam, to make it a truly inspirational, epic of epic proportions.....so to speak.

PS. must sort out this quote thingy one day....

[Kyt]

I loved that advert:

YouTube - Carling Dambusters Tv ad

and to get quotes end the quoted part with [/quote] and the same for the beginning of the section to be quoted but remove the /

[Kitty]

GD you are a nasty nasty man! Don't ever terrify the crap out of me like that again!