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25-03-2008, 07:45 PM
| #1 (permalink) |
| Kneel before Mod   Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 1,553
You're Top Poster: #4   | The infinite number of things Kitty is no longer allowed to do... I was re reading The 213 things Skippy is no longer allowed to do in the US Army the other day, and it came to me I'm starting to build my own list. But probably not as amusing as Skippy's, but give me time. So I'll add as and when i get told not to do something again. Feel free to add some in yourself. 1. It may be called Tourist Season but that does not mean I can shoot them. 2. It's called a life preserver for a reason. It is not a challenge. 3. Diesel is not fun. 4. Neither is fire. 5. I'm not allowed to combine the two. 6. Lectures are not a time to sleep. 7. It does not matter how much i enjoy listening to gossip, i must not do it on work time. 8. I must not keep turning the heating on to full in mid June. 9. I am not a lost desert native who needs the heating turned on full in mid June. 10. Don't play with a power drill again. 11. Keep the strimmer away from people. 12. Specifically keep the strimmer away from myself. 13. Knives are only for professionals. 14. I must speak English in class. Dialect is not allowed even if the lecturer does find it amusing. 15. I must not torment first year students. 16. I must not torment other students. 17. I must not torment the lecturers. 18. I am not allowed to bring a T34 tanks to university as it is a listed building. 19. Same for Listed T34 Tanks. 20. I must not tell everyone I got food poisoning from eating food at university, even if it is true. 21. I must not tell the general public the direct phone number to my boss in order for them to complain. 22. I must not refer to fishermen as sad b******'s. Even thought they are. 23. Do not paint on the windows. 24. Do not treat the customers like idiots. 25. I must not take my lunch time whenever i feel like it. 26. neither am I allowed to close whenever i feel like it.
__________________ "Time is a great storyteller" If my calculations are correct SLINKY + ESCALATOR = EVERLASTING FUN God is the experience of looking at a tree and saying, "Ah!" - Joseph Campbell |
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25-03-2008, 07:55 PM
| #2 (permalink) |
| Άρης  Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Terra something or other
Posts: 5,241
You're Top Poster: #1  | 27. Must not punch customers, even if it is your lunch break
__________________ _________________  Beaufighter TF Mark Xs (NV427 'EO-L' nearest) of No. 404 Squadron RCAF based at Dallachy, Morayshire, breaking formation during a flight along the Scottish coast. February 1945. |
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25-03-2008, 07:57 PM
| #3 (permalink) |
| Άρης Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Terra something or other
Posts: 5,241
You're Top Poster: #1 | 28. You are not the rightful heir to Burger King, you're just telling a whopper.
__________________ _________________ Beaufighter TF Mark Xs (NV427 'EO-L' nearest) of No. 404 Squadron RCAF based at Dallachy, Morayshire, breaking formation during a flight along the Scottish coast. February 1945. |
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25-03-2008, 08:00 PM
| #4 (permalink) |
| Kneel before Mod Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 1,553
You're Top Poster: #4 | wouldn't touch burger king if i was on fire and they had the worlds last remainign fire extinguisher
__________________ "Time is a great storyteller" If my calculations are correct SLINKY + ESCALATOR = EVERLASTING FUN God is the experience of looking at a tree and saying, "Ah!" - Joseph Campbell |
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25-03-2008, 10:59 PM
| #5 (permalink) |
| Senior Member  Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Outer reaches, Melbourne, Victoria
Posts: 3,672
You're Top Poster: #2  | Kitty, you might have to clarify how those came about. Diesel and fire are a bit hard to combine anyway so you shouild be relatively okay there. Power drill? Strimmer? T34? Customers? 29. You must not drool on Upkeep. 30. You must not threaten violence to fellow forum members who simply want to give you a hug...LOL.
__________________ http://www.454-459squadrons.org.au/. http://www.awm.gov.au/index.asp  Aircraft from No. 60 Squadron levelling out for the "run in" to make a mast-head attack on a Japanese coaster off Akyab. Courtesy AWM. |
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26-03-2008, 11:43 AM
| #6 (permalink) |
| Kneel before Mod Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 1,553
You're Top Poster: #4 | It is possible to combine diesel and fire, just requires a bit of wood and some patience  strimmer = countryside work + boredom. Power drill = countryside work + signs + boredom + charged battery + no supervision + BIG drill bit T34 - long looooooooooooooooong story and a boring day at uni where a friend and I planned the destruction of the place. customers - I work in the tourism sector at the moment. and a new one today. 31. I am not alllowed to talk to my eldest brother before 9AM.
__________________ "Time is a great storyteller" If my calculations are correct SLINKY + ESCALATOR = EVERLASTING FUN God is the experience of looking at a tree and saying, "Ah!" - Joseph Campbell |
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26-03-2008, 11:53 PM
| #7 (permalink) | |
| Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Outer reaches, Melbourne, Victoria
Posts: 3,672
You're Top Poster: #2 | Quote:
 ...and since when did you have patience?
__________________ http://www.454-459squadrons.org.au/. http://www.awm.gov.au/index.asp Aircraft from No. 60 Squadron levelling out for the "run in" to make a mast-head attack on a Japanese coaster off Akyab. Courtesy AWM. | |
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27-03-2008, 12:30 PM
| #8 (permalink) |
| Kneel before Mod Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 1,553
You're Top Poster: #4 | when fire is the outcome i have infinite patience
__________________ "Time is a great storyteller" If my calculations are correct SLINKY + ESCALATOR = EVERLASTING FUN God is the experience of looking at a tree and saying, "Ah!" - Joseph Campbell |
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27-03-2008, 11:12 PM
| #9 (permalink) |
| Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Outer reaches, Melbourne, Victoria
Posts: 3,672
You're Top Poster: #2 | Crocodile Kitty?
__________________ http://www.454-459squadrons.org.au/. http://www.awm.gov.au/index.asp Aircraft from No. 60 Squadron levelling out for the "run in" to make a mast-head attack on a Japanese coaster off Akyab. Courtesy AWM. |
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28-03-2008, 06:45 PM
| #10 (permalink) |
| Kneel before Mod Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 1,553
You're Top Poster: #4 | *watches reference go overhead at mach 5* 32. I am not allowed to complain about fellow workers, even if they are a load of inbred eejits with no idea how to do the most basic of chores. 33. Neither am I allowed to write my complaints out.
__________________ "Time is a great storyteller" If my calculations are correct SLINKY + ESCALATOR = EVERLASTING FUN God is the experience of looking at a tree and saying, "Ah!" - Joseph Campbell |
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